Buttermilk Crêpes

crepes Have you ever used buttermilk in a recipe, and then the next day you wonder what the fuck you’re supposed to do with all that goddamn leftover buttermilk? You could deep fry stuff, which is gross and smells bad, or you could make Ranch Dressing, but then you would have to eat a salad, and why in the hell would you want to do that when you could be eating crêpes?  Crêpes are already awesome when they are just normal boring crêpes. But add buttermilk, and you are instantly transported to Paul Bunyan’s cabin, being served Sourdough Flapjacks by Cookie on a five mile long table. Anyway, here’s the recipe for my:


BUTTERMILK CRÊPES


Mix all the ingredients until the batter is light and smooth. You can do this in a mixer, in a blender (my favorite), or by hand. The batter will be much thinner than normal pancake batter. Pour the batter into a large measuring cup if you have one, something with a pouring spout (or don’t worry about it if you don’t have that) and refrigerate for 30 minutes or more. When you’re ready to make the crêpes, get your biggest pan or griddle ready. You will also want a little sauce dish of vegetable oil and a brush nearby, a crêpe spreader if you have one, and a bowl filled with hot water for the spreader, and a metal spatula (preferably a long thin one like you use for cake decorating or um…. crêpes). Heat your pan on medium-medium high, and brush a little oil on. Then pour (or if you don’t have a spout on your batter jar/bowl, just use a ladle) the batter into the center of the pan, and use your spreader to spread the batter evenly in a circle. If you don’t have a spreader, just tilt the pan around until it is totally covered. If there are any tears, just add a little bit of batter there. Put the spreader in the hot water, so that any residue is gone. Let the crêpe cook for a few minutes, until crisp on the edges, and golden brown on the bottom. Then using your spatula, and your fingers (I know, ouch, but whatever) fold it in half. Cook for a bit longer, then flip, and cook another little bit longer- this all depends on how brown you like your crepes (personally I like a little carbon in my foods, but my fiancé does not, so I do half and half). Fold it again, so it looks like a pie piece, and put it aside*. Make sure your pan is nice and clean, and brushed with a little more oil before you do your next crêpe. Also, make sure there is no water dripping into the pan from the spreader. If you want to add ingredients in the pan so they melt (like cheese), just add it after the first fold, and fold the crêpe over it. Voilà! You could also make smaller crêpes and just flip them over like normal pancakes (although I think that is kinda lame and not très chic). THINGS TO PUT ON CRÊPES:  Nutella, bananas, berries, apple butter, cinnamon brown sugar, crème fraîche or ricotta and strawberry jam, gruyère and rucola, tomatoes with mozzarella di bufala, maple syrup, butter, squeezed lemon and sugar, goat cheese with diced red grapes and rosemary, caramel sauce, etc. THINGS NOT TO PUT ON CRÊPES (i.e. what my fiancé puts on them): sriracha, tobasco, freshly ground chili flakes, sambal olek. Ew…. I about had a cow when he first did this, but now nothing fazes me.** He could put Windex on his pancakes and I wouldn’t bat an eye.*** Anyway, if you’re a total masochist and really can’t help yourself, try using dark chocolate sauce with a little chili- Mexican chocolate style, or add a pinch of cayenne powder to a savory crêpe. Or actually, do whatever the fuck you want, because you can! *When I make pancakes of any sort, I always heat the oven on the lowest setting, and keep the done pancakes in there on a nice big plate, so that everyone can eat hot pancakes at the same time! ** sorry boo, i loves you! *** WEIRD DIET TIP: Stars in Hollywood actually put Windex on their food to stop themselves from eating. I am not even kidding. I don’t recommend the Windex diet, as it is dangerous and wasteful.

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